National Bank of Obama, Reprise

I just friggin' HATE it when I'm onto something. (Please! I hope his subject doesn't become my weekly Sunday sermon.)

It makes me think all the grumpy crap I spew here actually means something. Don't get me wrong. I DON'T WANT IT TO! I'm going for nothing more than fanciful half-assed attempts to entertain a group of people (that'd be you 58+ million NObama voters and some of you 62 million Obama voters who...hopefully...someday come to your senses) that I spit out during 4 martinis.

Oh, hell. Full disclosure: I'm just jagging you...I SO friggin' want it all to be true (so that I look all cool and smart and get famous and shit), because that's what I'm supposed to say.

But it really isn't the truth.... The ACTUAL truth is really going to hurt these next 4 years (let's look forward to a little "hope and change" beyond then, shall we?).

I don't think he can win, no matter what The Messiah does (and if they ask me to pray for him during Sunday mass one more friggin' time, I swear I'm going to scream out "Jimmy Hoffa IS ALIVE!" just so they throw me out):

Nationalizing the banks. We tried that once...Thomas Jefferson pointed out how it's not even Constitutional. NOT that such trivialities friggin' matter anymore.

Creating a government-owned "bad bank" to take the toxic assets off of the bank's balance sheet. Yeah...that's a real great solution. Take on so much debt we'll never recover. That's a real bright idea.

Continuing the Bush Administration rescue plan of pumping in taxpayer money on an as-needed basis. I've been against this one all along: "Money, get back. I'm all right jack keep your hands off of my stack." If TARP has cost us this much so far...when will it ever friggin' end if we go on and on and on with this crap? Why...it friggin' won't.

It's a gawd. Awful. Mess.

BUT...

When you look at whacked statements such as this:

A nationalization plan would likely wipe out all shareholder equity, including the preferred shares, and turn ownership of the banks over to Uncle Sam. (I'm fine if Uncle Sam...which, right now, happens to be the "preferred shareholder"...gets less money...but what about your average shareholder...you and me?)

And this crap:

"If you took a nationalization policy, you would at least create some degree of certainty because now you know the government is going to stand behind these institutions," said Kevin Jacques, 49, a former economist with the Treasury Department. Gov't stand BEHIND something? I get real friggin' worried when the gov't is standing behind me. Don't you Kevin? That's why the Founders gave us this.

And this insanity...

It's really clear. REALLY clear. The National Bank of Obama has a damned friggin' good chance of becoming reality. And I can't even wrap my mind around where it's taking us...but I have a pretty good feeling it's nowhere good.

Guess I better practice my goose step.

Well...that's probably a little strong. Maybe I should just start with, "here are my papers, sir."