Tuesday, March 24, 2009

“Overseas Contingency Operation?” b. Hussein Could Have Done Better

Why stop at something so pedestrian as “Overseas Contingency Operation” in lieu of the term “Global War on Terror”?

b. Hussein and his pals could have been much, MUCH more creative, and, in particular, reflective of themselves and their beliefs. I mean, let’s face it: As an acronym, OCO doesn’t have quite the rhythm of GWOT, although the Bush administration apparently also considered dumping their term in favor of GSAVE, or Global Struggle Against Violent Extremism. But W stuck with the term and, unfortunately, left the dirty task of renaming 8 years of familiar rhetoric to the ChangeChangeChange! mojo of the b. Hussein administration. And thus GWOT, and any similarity to the refreshing term “G-spot,” is forever gone.

[Editor’s note: I have it on good authority that b. Hussein’s teleprompter refused to participate in the decision to go with OCO, thus solidifying his banishment to the White House basement during b. Hussein’s “Get Yo Ass Behind My $4 Trillion Budget” West Coast tour last week, which completely explains the “Special Olympics” and “are you punch drunk” incidents, further illuminating why we should observe complete forgiveness of his highness, our worshipful president, for he knows not what the hell he is doing.]

It’s disconcerting they didn’t give it a better shot, though. Honestly, OCO sounds like something borne of a professional society committee of doctors, like those responsible for the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual and such hip terms as OCD, ODD, and, my favorite…oh…hey…look over there…it’s a flag, flying upside down on my porch!...is that UPS delivering more 7.62 ammunition?!!??!!...umm…where was I?...oh yeah!…ADHD.

I know it’s a sticky issue for b. Hussein and all, what with him having sent letters to Hamas and videos to Iran, expressing allegiance and hoping to hypnotize them both with hope and change…alas, to no avail.

I suppose the new acronym could, perhaps, lull “overseas contingent” forces into submission over boredom. I mean, just what the hell does “Overseas Contingency Operation” mean, anyway? Is our presence among major sources of terrorism and terrorist training “contingent” upon b. Hussein playing dead in front of his Islamic friends?

[Dear Secret Service…'cause I know you watch: IN NO WAY can the previous statement be construed as a threat to anyone’s well-being. That would be COMPLETELY wrong and unjust.]

Do we no longer consider the maiming and killing of our American soldiers, sailors, marines, and airmen (and women) “war”? I guess it’s now an “operation,” as in the board game. (Or maybe b. Hussein and “Guns” Hussein, aka “Michelle,” had a particularly fun night in the White House and decided to rename the war effort after their kinky affairs. How SICK of them!)

All I know is, when I served for President Reagan, and then President George Bush I, facts were facts. The Soviet/Communist was the enemy, and the Islamo-Fascist was his cousin.

But…it’s a new day, and a new outlook, and I should rightfully show solidarity with b. Hussein and his tax cheats. As a result, I’ve decided to give them all a few alternative ideas for renaming the “Global War on Terror,” may the name rest in peace. I offer free non-exclusive rights to any of these fitting name choices to the good Ole U.S.A. I consider it my duty to Uncle Sam and his steward, b. Hussein (although I already gave 4 years of blood, sweat, and more blood, when most of b. Hussein’s administration was sucking on their mom’s teat, and accepting a free ride through college, graduate school, and law school):

  • BARACK: Be A Revolutionary And Communism Kompletes
  • ISLAMROCKS: I Salute Losers who Absolve Muhammad of Ridiculously Outrageous Crimes that Kill Society
  • HUSSEIN: Hurry Up and Sell out the States, Even Indiana


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