Naked Woman Tied To Tree In Tacoma Park Not A Problem

But that guy nearby wearing the Armani and taking a business call on his BlackBerry, now he looked suspicious so police hauled him in for questioning.

The line above is a figment of my imagination; the headline is not. In fact, I think the guy or gal who wrote that headline should retire; they'll never write a better one. Ever.

Here's the story:

TACOMA, Wash. -- Several police officers responded to a 911 report of a naked woman tied to a tree in Point Defiance Park in Tacoma.

Spokesman Mark Fulghum told The News Tribune officers talked with the woman and a man Tuesday in the Owen Beach area and determined it was a "consensual rendezvous."

No one was arrested.

The couple wasn't nearly as lucky as the pasties girl from Tacoma:

Pierce County prosecutors on Tuesday filed a misdemeanor charge of unlawful public exposure against a bikini barista spotted last year serving coffee while wearing only pasties on her breasts.

It’s the first time Pierce County prosecutors have leveled such a charge since some area espresso stand owners began requiring their baristas to show skin in addition to making drinks

But of all the naked stories floating around the innerwebz, this one probably has the most potential to have ramifications: "No 10 denies naked Brown called aide the C-word," although lately Goordoom seems to be making a comeback in the polls.

Says Mark Steyn:

The second round of the hot new reality show? No, the prime ministerial nude had been trying to fix up some one-on-one face time with Barack Obama only to be rebuffed and having to settle for a hurried few minutes with the President in the aisle of the UN kitchen as they exited the big world leaders’ banquet in New York. Hence, his naked fury. You don’t have to be a G7 head of government to appreciate that that’s not the most helpful headline at this stage in the electoral cycle.

Maybe Gordoom was just gearing up for Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transexual History Month.

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Naked Woman Tied To Tree In Tacoma Park Not A Problem

Snarky Photo Reel: Obama's Week in Review #9

Posted on behalf of Jamie.


Is it just me, or weren’t these same dirtbags shrieking that the use of the “nuclear option” (majority vote instead of 60-votes) would be the end of the Senate? Then they reverted to calling it just “reconciliation”… Then they focused group the name “simple majority”… Well, they are the majority, and they certainly are SIMPLE…


Date night may be fun for the Obamas, but it’s tough on the Secret Service…


Just when you think this POS can’t get more hypocritical, He doesn’t disappoint…Wasn’t He slamming Eric Cantor at the White House the other day for having a prop? Cantor had the nerve to have the Senate Healthcare Bill sitting in front of him… So, just a few days later, Barack Hussein Obama (Mmm, mmm, mmm) has a photo op with “doctors” in white lab coats standing behind Him while He blows off the Republicans and continues to shove through His plan. Besides, I thought He was pivoting to jobs, jobs, jobs…?

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Snarky Photo Reel: Obama's Week in Review #9

Demophobia

I live in Upstate New York. It is really a very beautiful state if you don't mind snow.

And corrupt politicians.

We keep losing NYS democrat pols due to various indiscretions:

Gov. Elliot "Spanky Spanky" Spitzer liked to romp with $4,000 dollar a night hookers and was asked to govern elsewhere;

The Lt. Gov. under Elliot Spitzer and current NYS Gov. Dave "Shut Up Bitch" Paterson announced last week that he is not running for reelection after influencing a domestic violence victim to not show up in a case against his top aide, David Johnson -- Paterson may still resign;

Fifteen term NY Congressman Charlie Rangel is stepping down from Chairman of one of the most powerful Congressional committees after - oh you know -- Snarky already tore him a new one;

And now brand new first-term NY Congressman Eric Massa announced today that he is resigning - after ethics complaints were lodged against him for sexually harassing one of his male staffers.

So now I am suffering from demophobia. A fear that if I step outside the house I will be insulted, robbed, beaten or buggered by a democrat politician.

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Demophobia

This Is Simply The Music Best Vid Evah ...

(You know, I was going to correct the headline, but I do believe it's the best one I've evah written.)

Really. It's mesmerizing, with the detail of a Hollywood blockbuster and the simplicity of an Indie camcorder shooting. The song isn't nearly as good as Ok Go's first video sensation, A Million Ways. But the choreography for this thing is stunning. It even has a whole Wired article dedicated to its making.

For nearly four minutes -- captured in a single, unbroken camera shot -- the machine rolls metal balls down tracks, swings sledgehammers, pours water, unfurls flags and drops a flock of umbrellas from the second story, all perfectly synchronized with the song.

Youtube is having issues (they must be partnering with the engineering temps for Facebook and Twitter), so, if it flakes out on you, MAKE SURE YOU SELECT THE HD SETTING in the bottom right corner and the thing should actually work.

HEY! Don't be like that. It can't all be about the Community Organizer in Chief.

P.S. Apparently I'm now influencing mega bloggers Jim Treacher and Frank Fleming, both posting this not long after I Tweeted this (@jtLOL is a follower). I'm always the almost-famous guy in the room. Don't ask me about my almost-Haiti trip.

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This Is Simply The Music Best Vid Evah ...

Obama Coffeebags* America

Image via Michelle Malkin

"Everything's been said."

"The debate is over."

"I don't see how another year of negotiations would help. Moreover, the insurance companies aren't starting over."

"The time to act is now."

More than a year after summoning Congress to act, Obama said, while introducing the 7,490,592nd iteration of Obamacare: "This is where we've ended up."

Right at the gates of the eighth circle of Hell.

P.S. Check out how the Zombiecrats plan to roll out this latest monstrosity, at Right Klick's Obamacare Strategery.

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*Coffeebagging:

A spin-off of teabagging, the dipping of one's posterior onto the face of a lying-down victim.

Like teabagging, coffeebagging is often employed in first-person shooting games such as Halo: Combat Evolved and Halo 2, where a player will squat over the body of a player who he/she has fragged. Hence the second player was "coffeebagged."

Halo 2: "You were coffeebagged by Chris

Chris: "I like coffeebagging"

And now the Conservative description of members of the bitter Coffee Party.

BTW: Remember when Obama said Zombiecrats shouldn't use reconciliation to pass Obamacare? Yeah. We shouldn't have expected him to honor that promise either.

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Obama Coffeebags* America

Obama's Brain Is Stooopid

Back during the campaign, the Community Organizer in Chief told us only the evil rich people would get tax increases: "Under my plan, no family making less than $250,000 a year will see any form of tax increase. Not your income tax, not your payroll tax, not your capital gains taxes, not any of your taxes."

Naturally, right after taking office, he raised taxes on all the sinful people who smoke, most of them earning less than $250,000.

Via NY Slimes

Now, to meet his cap and slave targets for the "pollutant" we exhale, we'll be taxed to drive our cars:

To meet the Obama administration’s targets for cutting greenhouse gas emissions, some researchers say, Americans may have to experience a sobering reality: gas at $7 a gallon.

To reduce carbon dioxide emissions in the transportation sector 14 percent from 2005 levels by 2020, the cost of driving must simply increase, according to a forthcoming report by researchers at Harvard’s Belfer Center for Science and International Affairs.

Captain Ahab supposedly is all about jobs, jobs, jobs, but you know damn well his pursuit of Moby Dick (health care) and the Jolly Green Apparition (global warming) is just a deliberate attempt to ruin this economy, and this country, forever.

He must think we're so stooopid we won't get it.

The reality is, the only thing that's stooopid is his brain.

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Obama's Brain Is Stooopid

You Know You’re Taliban When…

You're a cave-dweller with no cave in which to hide.

Blankets were left strewn across the network of 156 caves, used by Ayman al-Zawahiri, Osama bin Laden's deputy ... from the Times of London:

Pakistani forces have taken control of a warren of caves that served until recently as the nerve centre of the Taleban and al-Qaeda and sheltered Ayman al-Zawahiri, the second-in-command to Osama bin Laden.

“It was the main hub of militancy where al-Qaeda operatives had moved freely,” Major-General Tariq Khan, the Pakistan regional commander, said as he gave journalists a tour of Damadola yesterday.

The village, nestling among snow-capped peaks in the Bajaur region along the Afghan border, has been fought over for 16 months. It is the first time that the Pakistani Army has set foot in the village, which had long been dominated by the insurgents operating on the both sides of the Pakistan-Afghanistan border.

“Al-Qaeda was there. They had occupied the ridges. There were 156 caves designed as a defensive complex,” said General Khan, head of the Frontier Corps responsible for Pakistan’s counter-insurgency campaign in the region. He said that his forces had killed 75 foreign and local militants and cleared a zone up to the Afghan border, and that the campaign against the insurgents was in its final stage.

h/t: The Madmax of Conservatism

Which reminds me of an innerwebz meme I recently swiped from Mitchieville ...

You Know You're Taliban When ...

1. You refine heroin for a living, but have a moral objection to beer.

2. You own a £3,000 machine gun and a £5,000 rocket launcher, but you can’t afford to buy shoes.

3. You have more wives than teeth.

4. You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon unclean.

5. You think vests come in two styles: bulletproof and suicide.

6. You can’t think of anyone you haven’t declared Jihad against.

7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.

8. You were amazed to discover that mobile phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.

9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least two.

10. You’ve always had a crush on your neighbur's goat.

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You Know You’re Taliban When…

UPDATE: HE'S GONE!!!! PROOF Rangel Knew of Corporate Involvement in Caribbean Trips

Scroll to the bottom for a letter from Rangel to the Wicked Witch of Congress.

So ... Congresscriminal Charlie Rangel had his lawyer blast the House ethics panel last week for being "wrong on the facts and unsupported by the law," eh? He didn't know about the corporate financing, eh? It's not "good" that Rangel's been admonished, but The Wicked Witch of Congress says "it's not jeopardizing our country in any way," eh?

So, how come there are photos of good ole Charlie at a corporate event during one of the junkets ... and photos of corporate signs all around his lying ass?

From Peter Flaherty, the guy who gave the ethics committee the goods on Rangel:

The admonishment last week of House Ways and Means Committee Chairman Charles Rangel (D-NY) was based in part on photos, audio recordings and other materials that I provided the Ethics Committee from the 2008 St. Maarten junket. Rangel still claims, however, that he did not know of the corporate involvement. I went back today and found this photo. I did not provide it to the Ethics Committee because I never imagined that Rangel would make such a claim. This photo is more proof that Rangel’s protestation of ignorance is simply not plausible.

Go here to see the rest of the images. (Captions below are from Flaherty.)


Here’s another photo that shows the gentleman above in the blue jacket is Rangel. In both photos, to his right is former New York mayor David Dinkins. To his left is Carl McCall, the former Comptroller New York state.


Corporate sponsorship is manifested in three ways. First, corporate logos appear on the sign on the podium. Here’s a closer look at the sign.


Corporate logos were rotated on the projection screen, both individually and all at once.



GOTCHA! I wonder what Charlie's story will be now.

Cross-posted at PatDollard.com

BOOYAH UPDATE! Rangel takes his money and runs, resigning this very evening his chairmanship of the House Ways and Means Committee. It's only temporarily, supposedly, but maybe in the interim he'll learn to do his taxes properly.

According to Democratic officials, New York Congressman Charlie Rangel is set to temporarily step down from his chairmanship of the House Ways and Means committee.

After violating House rules last week and continuing investigations by the House Ethics committee into Rangel's campaign finances and unreported income from rental properties, the Congressman has been the focus of growing pressure to resign his post as chairman.

One Senior Democratic Official tells me that Representative Pete Stark of California is set to take over the chair for the time being, but debate on the issue continues.

Says WSB Radio's @Jamiedupree (via Twitter): "The irony here is interesting, since Rangel replaced Rep Adam Clayton Powell Jr, who was dogged by ethics issues."

CONFUSING (DISTRICT OF CRIMINALS PAR) UPDATE II: Via MSNBC ((I screened it for Tingles or Overbite but found no trace):

Asked by an NBC reporter if he will remain chairman, Rangel responded with an emphatic "yes."

"You bet your life on it," he said.

But two Democratic sources tell NBC News that Rangel will take a "leave of absence" — beginning Wednesday — until the investigation is over.

The powerful Democrat was encouraged to step aside before the House votes on a bill to strip him of his chairmanship.

"We don't have the votes to save him," one Democratic member said of Rangel.

BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE UPDATE III: Now, you know you can trust a source like Snark & Boobs (really, she's really snarky ... and she has boobs, just ask her) ...

Some news outlets are reporting that the ever corrupt Charlie Rangel (D-NY) will be stepping down as chairman of the Ways and Means committee.

OH, FER CHRIST SAKES MAKE UP YOUR MIND PLOT THICKENS LIKE GRITS UPDATE IV: Late night vibes via Politico. He's out, he's in, maybe ... maybe ... out ... just this once, after all, being aged 4,073 has its druthers:

As he emerged Tuesday night from a meeting in Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s ceremonial office – sometimes known on Capitol Hill as “the woodshed” – the New York Democrat insisted that he is still the chairman of the powerful tax-writing committee.

But he couldn’t guarantee that would be the case by Wednesday.

“I can’t make all those promises at my age,” the 79-year-old Rangel said

Republicans plan to force a House floor vote this week on whether to remove Rangel from the chairmanship following last week’s finding that he violated House gift rules by accepting a corporate-sponsored trip to the Caribbean.

I don't know why they call Pelosi's inner sanctum "the woodshed." They ought to call it The Cauldron.

FOR THE LAST FRIGGIN' TIME, I TOLD YOU SO UPDATE V: The tax-cheating tax law writer takes a leave of absence, via JammieWearingFool:

U.S. Representative Charles Rangel announced today that he sent a letter to House Speaker Nancy Pelosi asking for a leave of absence from his post as chairman of the tax-writing House Ways and Means Committee.

Rangel, a Democrat from New York, declined to give details as to what prompted his decision to relinquish leadership of the panel, which also has jurisdiction over Social Security, trade and Medicare. Rangel was admonished for breaking House rules on accepting gifts.

Here's the bitter one-sentence letter from the tax cheat. Cry baby.

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UPDATE: HE'S GONE!!!! PROOF Rangel Knew of Corporate Involvement in Caribbean Trips

Jim Bunning Is Caving This Very Minute

But I don't blame him. Not one bit. For one shining moment, Bunning stood up, tall and strong, against suicidal government spending, against ridiculousness, against the deficit-hogging juggernaut that is deliberately tipping this country over the edge into oblivion.

Mr. Bunning is merely asking the Senate to live by the rules that President Obama said it should when he signed an executive order requiring "pay-as-you-go" budgeting. "Now, Congress will have to pay for what it spends, just like everybody else," he said, only three weeks ago. But instead of backing Mr. Bunning's stand that new spending must be "paid for," the White House is attacking him.

The real story here is that Mr. Bunning is exposing pay-go as a fraud. When Mr. Obama and Democrats want to spend money on their priorities, they waive the rule by declaring an emergency. They only enforce pay-go to block tax cuts. The Senate will soon follow with another $85 billion spending bill, and rest assured that too will violate pay-go rules.

Another truth is that Mr. Bunning is making most Republicans as uncomfortable as he is Democrats. Bob Corker of Tennessee and Jim DeMint of South Carolina have stood up for him. But most Republicans were content to obey Mr. Reid's request to borrow $10 billion more, and they find Mr. Bunning embarrassing. As we went to press last night, the pressure on Mr. Bunning to give way was intense.

But he could stand up and take direct hits for only so long. You knew it had to end. The latest depressing news from The Hill:

Sen. Jim Bunning (R-Ky.) appears set to release blanket hold he had placed Tuesday on all of President Obama's nominees, according to Majority Leader Harry Reid's (D-Nev.) office.

Bunning agreed tonight to end his blockade on extending unemployment benefits, but his decision to block all of the President's nominees is independent of that deal, according to Reid's office.

The Kentucky Republican, is the second senator this session to employ a blanket hold. Sen. Richard Shelby (R-Ala.) used the same tactic earlier this year in hopes of securing a defense appropriation for his home state. Shelby eventually relented.

Bunning's office was not available for comment.

Any senator can prevent a vote on a nominee by placing a hold, but the procedure is often used to block specific nominees, not all of them.

I blame the rest of the Republicans that let 2006 and 2008 happen and who, apparently, have no friggin' idea what 2010 represents for them and the nation ... because they didn't stand with him.

The spending has to stop. Hard choices have to be made. It has to start with one party, the party (I thought) of the adults. And if it doesn't start with the Republicans?

Fuck it.

Let the TEA Party movement seize the day.

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Jim Bunning Is Caving This Very Minute

Liars, Thieves, and Clowns #4

Posted on behalf of Jamie


A friend, Dave, nagged me to do this… keep nagging. BTW, Dave – Important safety tip: if the Pentagon is on fire, get out next time.


The White House’s most frequent visitor, Andy Stern – the head of SEIU is now officially on the WH team to bring down the deficit. You remember him, the guy who just said, “Workers of the world unite, it’s not just a slogan anymore” How appropriate to have someone grossly responsible for the deficit to be on the team to bring it down…


So, how’s Nancy Pelosi doing on that whole draining the swamp, ending the culture of corruption thing…?


We have such a weakling for a president.

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Liars, Thieves, and Clowns #4

Atlanta Obama Voter Goes Rogue, Creates Joker Statue in Protest

You know the wheels are coming off the Hope and Change slave train when an Atlanta artist who voted for Zero suddenly finds himself as a political satirist with his art for sale on ebay for as much as the ludicrous some of $5 million (no offense to Andy Davis, but I wouldn't pay 5 pesos for anything resembling Obama).

Perhaps it's a gesture toward convincing Obama to curb his enthusiasm for deficit spending...

He said he took the image seen at Tea Party rallies around the country and painted it onto some miscast busts of Obama.

"I believed that the state of politics in America has kind of become somewhat of a joke," Davis said.

He said he didn't set out to make the president into the Joker, the famed villain from Batman.

When Obama was elected, Davis said he made 50 bronze busts and sold them for $500 to $1,000 a piece. But then Davis said he grew frustrated by the bailouts, by the country's growing debt, that he felt his personal freedoms were threatened.

"Several months ago I was at the studio, I had some paint laying around for a couple of years, a few of the miscast pieces of Barack Obama, and I started painting the Obama joker face," Davis said.

"It's political satire, and it's the first time I've ever really done something like that."

"I was going to say because you're not a political satirist," said 11Alive Reporter Jaye Watson.

"Exactly! But I'm a red-blooded American who loves my freedom," Davis replied.

He said he gave some of the joker busts to friends, he sold some, one even wound up on eBay, and one was a door prize at a Tea Party fundraiser in Rockdale County.

"I think it raised quite a bit of money," Davis said.

Critics of the Obama Joker have said it's disrespectful to the office of the president. Davis said it's politicians who are disrespectful to America.

"Some perceive the Obama joker as being racist, what do you say to that?" Watson asked.

"What I painted was a sculpture," Davis said. "I painted an image of a joker on the sculpture, and when I was doing it myself, the thought of race did not come into my mind, not even for a millionth of a second."

"How did you hope it would be received and perceived?" Watson asked.

Davis said, "I really did not, I didn't care, and I don't care now as long it's perceived and received by a lot of people and then they can draw their own conclusions. "

He said he is not a member of the Tea Party, but he feels that they're people like him, organizing and standing up.

For this lifelong mainstream artist who brings rebellious characters to life, a controversial move of his own.

"I always play the good guy," Davis said. "For once I want to play the mean guy, the Darth Vader character or the bad boy. Well, this was my chance to break out and maybe this is kind of my Darth Vader. Who knows?"

Hey, we all know that in America life imitates art, so ... go buy that statue!

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Atlanta Obama Voter Goes Rogue, Creates Joker Statue in Protest

UPDATE: Suicides for Al Gore

First he skitters from his roach cave to resurface yesterday. Now this. Add another line to the list of Al Gore's crimes: accessory to murder/suicide.

A seven-month-old baby girl survived three days alone with a bullet in her chest beside the bodies of her parents and toddler brother.

Argentines Francisco Lotero, 56, and Miriam Coletti, 23, shot their children before killing themselves after making an apparent suicide pact over fears about global warming.

Their son Francisco, two, died instantly after being hit in the back.

But their unnamed daughter cheated death after the bullet from her dad's handgun missed her vital organs.

Paramedics rushed her to hospital covered in blood when police alerted by worried neighbours discovered the massacre three days later.

The youngster is recovering in hospital in the town of Goya in the northern Argentine province of Corrientes, where doctors say she is out of danger.

Her parents said they feared the effects of global warming in a suicide note discovered by police

UPDATE: This won't absolve Gore of his complicity in the above murders, but it will allow you to leave this sickening post on a lighter note: Gore's name in Latin means "to cool".

How ironic.

via Weasel Zippers

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UPDATE: Suicides for Al Gore

Physical Exam Shocker: The pResident Is Brainless!

A Photochop by Jamie

DISTRICT OF CRIMINALS -- CT and MRI and PET scan results from pResident Joker’s first periodic physical exam shockingly revealed the emperor has no brains.

According to Cpt. Jeffrey IGiveObamaGreatHealthCare, MC, FS, USN, physician to the pResident, Obama functions via a bizarre new symbiosis, initially being called Governmentitis, with Joe Biden and Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid, all of whom were previously known to be brainless.

Collectively, the four-headed parasitic beast feeds off the American people, sucking the money and life out of everyone. Rumors persist that the vice president’s head is actually a balloon depicting a finger-painting of what used to be Biden’s real face, and that the pResident's teleprompter has been emailing Obama's BlackBerry with phrases like "we're not campaigning anymore" and "those are all talking points, and they're in this bill."

“It’s a medical marvel,” the pResident’s physician said. “It certainly explains why he's never had a real job.”

For her part, Pelosi giggled upon hearing the news.

“We’re very much like those Nazi tea-bagers because we also don’t have a leader,” she said.

Reid just moaned and hissed what appeared to be the word "braiiiinns."

In other news, the White House released yet another version of the pResident’s health deform bill, this time stunningly brief, the entire contents found in one, simple five-word statement:

“Gimme. It is all mine.”

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Physical Exam Shocker: The pResident Is Brainless!