Showing posts with label 2010 Elections. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 2010 Elections. Show all posts

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Obama Gets Lovin' Despite Historic Midterm Smackdown

The Loser in Chief may have lost his mandate last night, when the American people responded to him calling them "the enemy" by firing The Wicked Witch of Congress and her Merry Band of Congresscriminals.

But all is not lost! At least Zero is getting some good lovin' today overseas.


Only problem is, the doll with his likeness is not anatomically correct.

His head's not up his ass.

And, anyway, he wouldn't know what to do with all those white women if he had an instruction booklet.

Hey! I wonder if, instead, he'll be getting it on with The Official Democratic Party Blow-up Doll.


But maybe not, since last night pretty much assured that Democrats aren't going to be having any fun for a very long time, let alone getting laid. In fact, they may all be better off lying down and going to sleep in the new symbol for the Democratic Party.


Bring out yer dead!
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Monday, April 26, 2010

Racist In Chief Shows His True "Colors"

Just once I want to be wrong about this clown. Just once I want someone to prove to me beyond a doubt that the president of these United States of America has a sliver of genuine concern for this country, its future, and the well-being of 300 million natural-born, red white and blue citizens. Just once I want to look around and know that the most powerful man in the world has gotten beyond the ridiculous issue of race and is focused on doing what is right.

Heh! But I'm just a hate-mongering mobster teabagger.

Who needs white male voters, anyway? Via Newsalert
"This year, the stakes are higher than ever," he said, according to a transcript of his remarks provided by Democratic officials. "It will be up to each of you to make sure that young people, African Americans, Latinos and women who powered our victory in 2008 stand together once again."


H/T: Instapundit
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Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Pain, Damage Don't End the World. Or Despair. The World Ends When You're Dead. Until Then, More Punishment Is in Store. Be a Man & Give Some Back

Otherwise to be translated as "SCREW YOU" Obama and your Merry Band of Congresscriminals. We won't back down.

Watch out, you bastards. That sound you hear creeping up behind you is the American people coming for you ... at the ballot box.

After that, we'll let Ole Scratch grab your asses and suck you down into the abyss and seat you at your rightful place ... at the dinner table ... in the Eighth Circle of Hell.



Via PatDollard.com
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Sunday, March 21, 2010

"There Are No Rules Here ... We Make Them Up As We Go Along"

As if this fucking piece of shit needed to say it out loud. But I'm glad he did. It's just more campaign ad fodder to help send this Congresscriminal back home to Flori-duh in November, preferably with a deadly communicable disease.

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Monday, March 8, 2010

District of Criminals Considers Medicinal Marijuana to Ease Dem's Pain in 2010

Excuse me while I move some files from the Word Press site over here so I can delete that thing forever. If you didn't see this before, now's your chance!

Previously published 1/12/2010

WASHINGTON – Officials in the nation’s capitol are poised to pass legislation that would legalize medicinal marijuana in the District of Criminals specifically to help members of an ailing Congress and White House, where unhealthy delusions of grandeur are rampant and widespread unemployment looms.

The rules will apply to a swath of the city defined by rigid boundaries spanning from Capitol Hill to the White House. The section of the city will now be called Tijuana del Norte, instead of the endearing term locals use for it, The Sped Zone. The rest of D.C. will be designated a no toking area.

“It’s been a difficult year for the Democrats in Congress and the White House, despite some of their perceived legislative victories,” said Ward 4 D.C. Councilman Joey Roachclip, a longtime supporter of social causes like medicinal marijuana use and bong hits for the homeless. “We just wanted to give them a way to manage their pain during the coming year, which portends to be even more brutal.”

Roachclip sponsored the legislation once public backlash over Obamacare during the Christmas holiday showed, in poll after poll, that 99.9 percent of congresscriminals will be lucky to make it home for their next winter break without being skinned alive and fed to the Asian snakehead fish pillaging the Potomac. Some experts, however, claim that the normally ravenous snakeheads wouldn’t touch a congresscriminal with Henry Waxman’s teeth

Congressman Henry Waxman (Dickhead, California)

The situation is becoming increasingly depressing for Democrats, with Republican Scott Brown dangerously close to winning the empty U.S. Senate seat for Massachusetts, especially since Brown knows how to spell the state’s name while his opponent apparently does not. Brown and Massachusetts Attorney General Martha Coakley square off next week in a special election for the seat of former Sen. Ted Kennedy, who is now president of hell.

In fact, last week, Sen. Christopher Dodd (Dickhead, Connecticut) decided to join Byron Dorgan of North Dakota and several shady congresscriminals among the ranks of the unemployed next year because they’re so far removed from what’s really going on in America they would have gotten their asses kicked in November even by undead opponents.

“I haven’t the brains to compete with zombies,” Dodd said, turning away to slither under a rock.

The legislation will also help pResident Barack Obama honor his goal of making the District of Criminals more transparent. Right now, Obama hides in the private study Bill Clinton once used to grope visitors, to habitually smoke hash for nerve damage he suffered earlier in the year when Michael Jackson’s bizzare brain was implanted in his skull.

“The pResident would certainly like to be more open about being a stoner,” said Chief White House Illiterate Robert Ahhh Gibbs.


Via Moonbattery

In other news from the District of Criminals, Republicans have introduced legislation in the House that would create a federal agency to regulate the apologies of public officials, such as that of Senate majority leader Harry Reid. The Washington Times reports: “The Apologetics and Atonement Administration would be assigned to the Ministry of Euphemy, charged with measuring the sincerity of the miscreants and gauging how abject they really are.”

Vice President Joe Biden said he owes America for numerous gaffes he never apologized for and would volunteer to be the first to try some of the new penalties that would be enforced under the legislation, such as waterboarding and autoerotic asphyxiation.

“I’d choose having to inhale the fumes wafting from Helen Thomas’ feet,” Biden said. “I hear it’s better than smoking crack.”

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Obama Offers Massachusetts Voters Blotter Acid on Behalf of Coakley; Most Flee

Excuse me while I move some files from the Word Press site over here so I can delete that thing forever. If you didn't see this before, now's your chance!

Previously published 1/17/2010




With time desperately slipping away from the Democratic candidate for the Massachusetts Senate seat, party officials brought in their heavy hitter Sunday, pResident Barack Obama, attempting to distract as SEIU members clubbed excite voters.

But people immediately scattered from the city of Boston, fearing Obama’s stink would bore into their flesh and remain with them for eternity. Only about 50 people gathered, most of them homeless, most there only to conduct body heat, for the rally at Northeastern University, where Obama tossed tabs of blotter acid bearing his likeness into the crowd.

One homeless man picked a hit off the ground and turned it over and, seeing the pResident’s visage, angrily threw it on the ground before shuffling away.

“Dude … you’re supposed to give out free drugs BEFORE you sucker people into buying your shit,” he mumbled to himself. “I was an investment banker 12 months ago and bought your hope and change at cost; now I’m a dumpster diver. I’d say the return on my former ENRON stock was better than my investment in you.”


Still, despite the bleak crowd and desperate look on the face of candidate Massachusetts Attorney General Martha Coakley, who stood nearby kneading the beads of a baphomet rosary, Obama pressed on with his typically impressive teleprompter-assisted, non-Negro dialect.

“We come together here in Boston because that racist tea-bagging Republican Scott Brown poses a grave and growing danger to our agenda,” Obama said, his nose so high in the air you could see inside his empty brain cavitiy. “You would not be here unless you — like me — were convinced that this danger is real. This is not fiction, this is science. Unchecked, Conservative fillibusters will pose unacceptable risks to our plans to take over healthcare, our machinations for new world order, and, most of all, our feelings.

“I believe that we can act boldly, and decisively, in the face of this common threat. And that is why I have come here today. Only Martha Coakley is uniquely qualified to carry on the curroption that eminated from this seat in the Senate, from 1962 until late last year, in the hands of the late, but forever morally bankrupt, Ted Kennedy. Help us continue, in his honor and in his memory, to deliver the best, most vacuous qualities of the Democratic party. You must elect Martha Coakley to the U.S. Senate.”

When Obama finished, he lowered his head enough to look back at where the crowd should have been. They were gone. He turned to find Coakley, but she too had disappeared (and was later rumored to have been kidnapped by Red Sox fans). Obama shrugged and stepped down from the dias and arrogantly started off toward his limosine, blissfully unaware of just how far he and the Democratic Party have grossly underestimated the American people and the party’s staying power.

MASSACHUSETTS: VOTE SCOTT BROWN ON TUESDAY!

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Brown Wins Massachusetts; Now, Republicans, Don't Screw This Up

Excuse me while I move some files from the Word Press site over here so I can delete that thing forever. If you didn't see this before, now's your chance!

Previously published 1/19/2010




I remember feeling back in November 2008 like the earth had suddenly skidded to a harrowing halt and started spinning precariously in reverse, throwing everything safe and real and decent into oblivion, as if to erase the entire American Century and plunge the nation into the dark ages.

I felt that sudden grinding halt again today, but the results were as blissful as an ocean breeze: Almost a year to the day of the inauguration of pResident Barack Obama, Republican Scott Brown shocked the entire country, delivering “Ted Kennedy’s” Senate seat to its rightful owner – the people of Massachusetts.

Massachusetts Attorney General Martha “Marcia” Coakley conceded to Brown with 79 percent of returns in. Brown now becomes the 41st Republican in the U.S. Senate, seemingly (if he’s the real deal and other Republicans stand firm) making the Democrats’ goal of sending truckloads of nanny-state legislation to the pResident’s desk nearly impossible.

By some accounts some 2 million voters came to the polls … in a snowstorm … during a special election, a remarkable turnout to pick the next senator for a seat held by a Democrat for nearly 50 years, in the most communist of the blue states.

Brown, a lieutenant colonel in the National Guard who CNN hilariously called the “insurgent” candidate, came seemingly from nowhere, a one-time Sexyist Man in America for Cosmopolitan magazine and literally a little-known state legislator who electrified Massachusetts voters and donors from across the nation, at one point last week raising a million dollars a day for his campaign.

Maybe he wasn’t the most or best “conservative” candidate for all seasons, but beyond a doubt he was the best conservative candidate for, perhaps, the most important political season of our lifetime.

And he had a lot of help.

Over the past few weeks, Coakley’s campaign had imploded in spectacular fashion, fueled in large measure by her own incompetence. Catholics shouldn’t work in hospital emergency rooms because of their views against abortion. Scott Brown was a lowlife for waiting outside Fenway Park to shake hands with fellow lowlifes leaving a hockey game. Voters were too stupid to understand the healthcare deform bill. Red Sox great Curt Schilling was a Yankee fan.

Who needs SNL when you have “Marcia” Coakley around? You just can’t make shit like this up.

By the time Monday arrived, Coakley’s phone banks were empty. So were three quarters of a gym at a Framingham middle school gym for a Coakley stump the night before polls opened. And as voting began Tuesday, her support had eroded like a beach beaten down by a hurricane. The sands beneath her feet hadn’t just shifted. They’d been swept away to a different continent.

That still didn’t stop her supporters from breaking Massachusetts election laws, like posting campaign signs near polls and handing out blank absentee ballots after the deadline for filing them had passed. In the meantime, out-of-state union thugs threw in their own weight, by bullying reporters, so threatened by a shaky video camera they resorted to the ultimate admission of having fucking lost their minds — calling them “nazis.”

Beautifully, even the Boston Globe chipped in, reporting a Coakley win – 8 hours before polls closed.

But when it was all said and done, Brown stood victorious.

Despite the ridiculous promise from the Wicked Witch of Congress that “one way or another” a bill will end up on the pResident’s desk, Brown’s victory assures that, as even the gweat degenerate cocksman Bawney Fwank declared, healthcare deform, the single most important issue that will define Zero’s pResidency and the only campaign promise he came remotely close to fulfilling, is dead.

Oh, you’ll hear talk for weeks now about whether or not the Senate will delay seating Brown or the House will cave and pass the Senate healthcare deform bill, but even now support for the awful legislation is slipping among some House Congresscriminals — if you can believe them. You have to wonder how Joe Lieberman and Ben Nelson would vote today, knowing what they know now.

Make no mistake: This is a referendum on, and the beginning of the end for, the Wicked Witch of Congress and Dirty Harry and, most importantly, Zero, the worst president in modern history. The Zombiecrats can hide beneath their veil of incredulity at the loss and spit fire while secretly licking their wounds, but the fact is: They’ve had control of all three legislative branches of government for a year … and haven’t accomplished shit.

They’ve brought this all on themselves. They’ll have to live with their own stupidity. They can’t pin this one on Bush.

This day now presents Republicans with a chance to build momentum into elections in November 2010 and November 2012. From this day forth, Republicans must create a cohesive and comprehensive plan for America, stick to it, and, for God’s sake, not screw this up.

It’s the Republicans’ last chance to take this country back and do something they should have done long ago — roll back all of the moonbat socialism that’s slowly enveloped our Constitution and freedoms like a boa constrictor with a cat’s playful cruelty.

And if they fuck this up, you can bet your sweet ass the earth will shudder to one last halt, as a tide of anger rises from an American people who’ve had quite enough incompetency from the District of Criminals … forever.

Cross-posted at patdollard.com

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