Meet the New Czars

I apologize for not being around much this weekend. Family necessities (like chasing the little ADHDs around first my house, then someone else's house, yelling and screaming and threatening to send them to live with the president and ultimately collapsing to catch my breath because I'm getting too fat and old to be chasing little evil vessels of vitality around anyone's house) and few organized thoughts have kept me away.

Not that my thoughts are what I'd call organized on any other day.

Luckily, I ran across this little laugher, by Andrew Thomas of Dark Angel Politics via American Thinker, this morning before heading off on another fun-filled day of family torture.

Click to scratch and sniff.

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Meet the New Czars

I Got Your Thrill Right Here, Chris

Leave it to MSNBC's Chris Matthews, the worst "news show" host on TV -- cable, PPV, or network -- to get the Quote of the Year for this zinger. Sorry, but I don't feel comfortable publishing such filth, even in this lowly place.

Matthews, always a step away from blowing a gasket on TV while pretending to be "hardball" (more like hard up), uttered his immortal brain fart about, you guessed it, the Messiah.

Other blissfully notable tongue slips include:

The Crush Rush Award for Loathing Limbaugh
Author/humorist P.J. O’Rourke: "It’s the twilight of the radio loud-mouth, you know? I knew it from the moment the fat guy [Rush Limbaugh] refused to share his drugs...."
Host Bill Maher: "You mean the OxyContin that he was on?...Why couldn’t he have croaked from it instead of Heath Ledger?" — HBO’s Real Time with Bill Maher, February 8.

Madness of King George Award
"When somebody asks you, sir, about the cooked books and faked threats you foisted on a sincere and frightened nation; when somebody asks you, sir, about your gallant, noble, self-abnegating sacrifice of your golf game so as to soothe the families of the war dead; this advice, Mr. Bush: Shut the hell up! Good night and good luck." — MSNBC’s Keith Olbermann in a "Special Comment" on Countdown, May 14.

Barbra Streisand Political IQ Award for Celebrity Vapidity
"If you have a few hundred followers, and you let some of them molest children, they call you a cult leader. If you have a billion, they call you ‘Pope.’ It’s like, if you can’t pay your mortgage, you’re a deadbeat. But if you can’t pay a million mortgages, you’re Bear Stearns and we bail you out. And that is who the Catholic Church is: the Bear Stearns of organized pedophilia." — Bill Maher on HBO’s Real Time, April 11.

Hey, Bill. By the way...someday I'd like to meet you...and punch you in the friggin' nose, you godless prick.

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I Got Your Thrill Right Here, Chris